SCARS TELL A STORY. THEY ARE REMINDERS OF WHEN THE ENEMY TRIED TO BREAK US BUT FAILED!
The past few months has been quite a challenging journey, but once again Abba Father is faithful and He turned around that which the enemy tried to use against me for His glory!
End of November last year, I developed a soft buzz in my left ear, almost sounding like a fridge, which was quite annoying, especially in the evenings when i tried to sleep. I did a bit of research and figured I've probably got some form of tinnitus. Since I've been doing many healing conferences with the Eagles Wings ministry, I've learned alot about the spiritual roots of many diseases. One of the roots of tinnitus could be fear. Although I've made a lot of progress in the area of fear, I certainly havent gained full victory over it yet. I started with a Daniel fast for two weeks since I really wanted breakthrough regarding my fears. After two weeks i went a few days to Singapore for a conference and broke my fast. When i got back i clearly heard Abba speak to my spirit that He wants me to continue fasting, this time for 8 weeks. I wasnt jumping up and down with excitement to be honest, but I knew I had to be obedient.
A couple of weeks later the buzz was still there so I booked to go see an ear, nose and throat specialist. He couldnt see anything in my ear causing the buzz, so he send me for a brain scan just to be certain there's nothing in my brain causing it. I almost cancelled the appointment since I was so sure they won't find anything, but in the end I decided to go. On the 15th of December the doctor phoned me, and said he couldnt see anything that was related to the buzz at all, but he just need to inform me that there's a big brain tumour on my brain. "A WHAT?" I was thinking to myself. He told me he would send the scan to a neurosurgeon who would phone me back soon. Five minutes later he phoned, and told me not to worry too much. It looks like a Meningioma which is a very slow growing non-cancerous tumour. I must go and enjoy my holiday, and come see him in the new year since he was fully booked for the rest of December. The first 2 days felt totally unreal and it was hard for me to wrap my mind around it. On the 3rd day, it hit me. "I've got a brain tumour"! Never in my life would I have thought it would happen to me! Thankfully because I was fasting I didnt go into a panick attack, and felt really strong spiritually. I went on holiday and tried to forget about it, not even telling my parents.
On the 4th of January I went for my appointment. The doctor suggested I wait for another 6 months and see what the tumour does. After about a week, in which I didn't feel peace at all, I went for a second opinion. This time it was a complete different story. The specialist told me its a big tumour, 3 cm x 1.75cm, and it is 1 mm away from my facial nerves. Once it starts touching that there can be major risks, like loosing your hearing completely in the one ear, becoming paralysed in half your face and other major risks. If it just keeps on growing it could eventually kill you.This thing needed to be removed soon! At first I was a bit disappointed because I've just learned for a whole year how to deal with the root of different diseases. One of the spiritual roots of a Meningioma is once again fear. God has been confirming with me over and over that I need to still overcome my fears, especially fear of rejection. I first got excited thinking that I'm going to apply all the principles I've learned the past year, the tumour is gonna shrivel up and disappear and I'm going to have this awesome testimony! This idea soon went out the window. I needed brain surgery! Where's the testimony in that? Immediately Holy Spirit dropped in my spirit that there will still be a testimony! Just the fact that Abba already laid on my heart to fast, preparing me spiritually and physically for what was to come is a testimony! And if it wasnt for the buzz, I would never have known about it until it could've been too late. Soon I just felt a supernatural peace coming over me, and I knew I have to have this removed. Sometimes it is a process to deal with our spiritual wounds, it doesnt always happen overnight. When we are in a health risk situation, God also uses doctors to get us out of danger. My situation was already a huge risk, even just working in that area, removing the tumour would be a risk, since its already very close to the facial nerves. I was told that it won't be possible to remove the whole tumour, but only a part of it, and that I would need to go for radiation afterwards to remove the rest. I didn't have peace about radiation and just prayed and trusted in the Lord that the whole tumour would be removed. In the meantime I continued my Daniel fast, and also started drinking alot of raw vegetable juices. During that time I got alot of prophetic word and confirmation that, as Abba is going to physically remove this 'lump of fear', he is also going to spiritually come and set me free from all my fears, and that nothing is going to be left behind!
On the 10th of February was my big day! It was an eight hour surgery, and I was put on a ventilator for 24 hours. The surgeon was able to remove the whole tumour with nothing left! They started waking me up, but it took me 2 days for everyone to convince me that I wasnt dreaming. Everything felt very unreal. The first thing I said when I woke up which I cant remember was "ITS TIME, ITS TIME, Abba said I must open my eyes, ITS TIME! I stayed in ICU for 4 nights, and another 7 nights in a private hospital room, which im so grateful for. My spirit was extremely awake when I woke up, like never before, and Abba really spoke to me in this time. He gave me an assignment to write a book, called "Born for Such A Time". The main scripture He gave me was Esther 4:14 - For if you remain completely silent at this time, relief and deliverance will arise for the Jews from another place, but you and your father's house will perish. Yet who knows whether you have come to the kingdom for such a time as this?" It is my true life-story, all the twists and turns I took, how I eventually found my way back Home, and how He always turns my curses into blessings. Many things happened in the spirit during this whole ordeal, which is too much for me to explain now, but it will be all in the book. God once again exceeded my highest expectations!
A couple of days after I got released from hospital, someone send me the clip of Angus Buchan calling South Africa together to pray and intercede for our country. The Lord gave him two words "ITS TIME, ITS TIME" with the scripture from Mordecai to Esther "Who knows whether you have come to the kingdom for such a time as this." I almost fell off my bed when I listened to it! How awesome is our God! The Spirit is moving revealing the same things to His children!
Abba revealed to me that I will write the book in my six weeks recovery. Six weeks is over and my book is finished! He is so faithful. It will be edited soon, and hopefully be released within the next 2 months. No more shall I be silent but I shall share my story. Pesach starts tonight and I can celebrate my King with a joyful and thankful heart! He came to give us life and life in abundance! Through His stripes we are healed! Fear has no place in my life anymore! I am ready to launch like a rocket and this time nothing will be able to stop me! All glory to YAHWEH!
Have a blessed Pesach!